Bungie: Destined For Failure?

Activision recently announced that it's going to cost them half a billion dollars to create Bungie's new game "Destiny". $500 million. That's even more than the rumoured cost of BioWare's Star Wars online game "The Old Republic".

There are about 7 million Playstation 4s in the hands of consumers, and about 5 million Xbox Ones that have been sold. As has already been pointed out, the only way Destiny will be make a profit is if every single human being who owns a Playstation 4 and an Xbox One buys a copy of Destiny.

Destiny.

The game that's just Borderlands without the flavour, personality, art direction or comedic appeal.

The game where Peter Dinklage boredly tells you to go over here and shoot bad guys, then go over here and shoot more bad guys.

The game that marks the point where Bungie fired one of the great video game composers, for apparently no reason(my guess is to cut costs somewhere).

A game with no readily apparent characterization, no indicator of a compelling story, and no one talking about it. Other than how expensive it is, because why else would anyone talk about it?

Call of Duty Ghosts: System Requirements

The new Call of Duty blocks out paying customers of the PC version for made-up RAM requirements. Enjoy your $60 doorstop, kids!

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~A.H.

Activision Blizzard

Activision is now an indie studio. That is... weird.

Activision paid $8 billion to its' former parent company, Vivendi Universal, and now they're somehow in the same category as people who make games in their garage for pennies on the App store. If I recall correctly, id, the makers of Doom were the last big, AAA independently-owned studio. I don't quite know what Activision gains from this, but apparently that's a thing that's happened.

You guys... this means Call of Duty is now an indie-game. I think I need to lie down...


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~A.H.

Activision: "Project Icebreaker"

EA and Activision are like two horses in the Kentucky Derby who are maintaining a steady tie for the lead. Except if the goal for the horses was to be the bigger video game industry scumbag. Sometimes EA will catch a second-wind and pull ahead.

And then we'll find out about Bobby Kotick, Activision CEO hiring shady third-parties to access the computers of two guys he was planning on firing, who helped launch their biggest franchise, weeks before they were about to ink a deal with EA, their competitors. I especially like the part about how they considered, no shit, planning a "fake fumigation" so they could sneak in and access West and Zampella's computers for their e-mail accounts.


And Activision takes the lead!

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~A.H.

Obsidian: "Metacritic"

Business sucks, alright? It's cold and rigid and occasionally unfair. Such is the case with Obsidian's Fallout: New Vegas contract with Bethesda, wherein the developer only received royalties if the game matched or exceeded an 85 rating on Metacritic.

Who would do that? What kind of numbskull bases huge business decisions on the score they get at a review aggregate site? That's like a movie studio determining salaries based on the score they get at RottenTomatoes.com.

I don't think even the guys at EA or Activision are that reckless.

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~A.H.

A Letter From The Publisher

"Dear Mr. Tim Schaefer,

We regret to inform you that we will not publish your game. We do not feel confident at this time that anyone would be willing to pay for it. People only want brown and grey first-person shooters with chest-high walls and Madden. Nobody wants fun or creativity. Consumers would much rather have shitty sequels, movie tie-ins and intrusive DRM.

While it is true that you have maintained a level of trust with your audience, a transparent relationship of trust between a developer and the consumer has never equated to profitable business.


...Except for the 17,000 people who completely paid off your kickstarter project within 9 HOURS, with over a month still left to donate. This in turn raising over $800,000.

But other than THAT, clearly there is no demand for your work in this economic environment, Mr. Schaefer.


~Sincerely,

The Morons In Charge Of AAA Game Studios, DNR."

Capcom Must Die

Yesterday I drew some Mega Man fan-art. I still love the character designs and the potential of their games, but Capcom as a company has mutated into something awful. And I've decided to stop giving them my business.

In fact, I'd suggest you stop giving them your business too. No, really. Stop giving Capcom money. Stop it. Don't buy that new Resident Evil, don't buy whatever stupid Street Fighter vs. Sesame Street crossover they're making. We have to stop rewarding these people. Money is the only language this company understands, because they sure as hell don't understand creativity or respect.

Capcom hates you. You do realize this, right? Capcom hates you as an individual. You are an ATM machine to these people. They hate you, and your family, and that thing you love. They hated Keiji Inafune, the man who made them wealthy. The man whose ingenuity and hard work provided them with franchises they are still taking advantage of. They hate the fact that you wanted Mega Man Legends 3 more than Street Fighter vs. Sex And The City. They hated the fact that you keep asking for a character from a franchise they openly despise to keep making fighting game appearances. They hate Capcom-Unity for giving people a peek at the game development process.

They look at the people who allow them to prosper as unwashed, unworthy masses. They feel entitled to their success. I say the time has long since passed for us to take that away. This is absolutely something we can do.

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