Wednesday 10 June 2015

Fave Things Of 2014: Part II



Part 1 of the list can be found HERE. This will conclude the main list, and then after this is the Grand Jury Prize.

Brace yourself: the nerd levels get critical from here on out:


5. DARK SOULS II



2014 in gaming was... Sonic Boom. It was Rambo. It was the clueless, lazy design of Assassin's Creed Unity. The disgraceful sound-design of Thief. The unplayable, unplaytested Master Chief Collection. The hollowed-out husk of a game that Destiny was supposed to be. The embarrassment of the Elder Scrolls Online. The toxic cynicism and entitlement of Watch_Dogs. The contempt for the human race that was The Walking Dead: Season 2.


2014 was Duck Dynasty: The Game.


We're not just talking about games that didn't live up to their hype; This is the year where the entire industry stopped trying. We've reached an event horizon where we're lucky if a game is barely functioning after a year and six patches.


And how did gamers react to this? And to the clear corruption and ineptitude infecting game reviews and news coverage that gives rave reviews and coverage to garbage? They saw all of these problems, and their solution was to... send threats to women. An actual conclusion reached by a frightening number of people is that everything wrong with games can be traced back to vaginas.


This hobby has never been uglier, emptier and more insulting to the people who keep it alive. This is as low as video games have been since the industry crashed. Roger Ebert and Jack Thompson were wrong about video games, but by God did we ever try to prove them right last year.




Anyway, I just think there's an irony to the fact that a Dark Souls game didn't hate its' audience as much as everything else last year.




Tuesday 9 June 2015

Fave Things Of 2014: Part I



Here are some things I thought didn't suck last year. 3 parts, Top 10 format, with one special "Grand Jury" prize synonymous with first place.

Sorry it took so long:



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10. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY



I liked it. Could've been better, could've been worse. Great soundtrack and characters, though. I'm glad summer blockbusters can still have a heart.

I never thought I'd come close to crying over a tree and a raccoon.