Saturday, 13 July 2013

Beware The Batman: 10 Questions

"Beware The Batman" premiered today. It was such a pointless waste of the franchise, I expected Tom Hardy would show up with a mouth full of bees.

Below the cut are ten questions I had while watching it:

1.) -So, no introduction to the setting or characters? Just going right into the fight scene? I get that it doesn’t have to show us Batman’s origin story again, but… come on, guys. Give us something BEFORE the bank robbery fight scene. 
2.) -Why is Gotham City so empty? I could swear it was populated entirely by Batman, two hostages and two seriously lame villains. No civilians anywhere, cramped streets, everything is flat and open… it’s like looking at an incomplete toy model. There’s no indication that there’s any life off-screen. It’s not a world so much as it is a crappy set. 
3.) -Why does Batman always have such full, pouty lips? 
4.) -Why do they keep calling Jason Statham with the Sigma chin “Alfred"? 
5.) -How can the facial animation be worse here than in Transformers Prime, which was a show about robots with stiff metal faces? 
6.) -If the tone is supposed to be serious and action-packed, then why is there a belching cartoon frog?   
7.) -How come “Professor Pyg" is just a man wearing a pig mask, but “Mr. Toad" is an actual toad?   
8.) -And why does Pyg spend the whole episode making doctor puns when his title is “Professor"? 
9.) -Why is it the best part of this premiere was the 4 seconds of a flat, emotionless Lt. Gordon with the voice of Kurtwood Smith?
10.) -They canceled Young Justice for THIS??



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