==========
EXT. ???-MORNING
POV
Vicky’s eyes slowly adjust to daylight. Blinks when the
light of day is too much for her.
CLOSE UP
Vicky on the ground, outside on some grass. She is irritated
at sound and light, eyes closed. She groans, tries to shield
her eyes from the sunlight by raising her arm over her head.
ANGLE ON
Vicky struggling to sit up. Her hair is disheveled, her
clothes are unkempt and loose. A bare shoulder is exposed,
which she fixes. Then she makes a startling discovery.
ZOOM IN
One of her arms is missing. A dramatic music sting.
VICKY
(gasps)
My arm!!
BEAT
ZOOM OUT
VICKY
(mildly frustrated)
Where the heck did I leave it?
She looks around, and spies debris all around her. She looks
up and sees Oz resting on his stomach at the top of an
electrical pole.
VICKY
…Oz? OZ!
ANGLE ON
Oz is lying on his stomach on top of the electrical pole. He
is asleep, and is woken up hearing someone call his name.
Vicky and Oz shout to each other.
OZ
Huh? Oh, hey Vicky!
VICKY
How’d you get up there??
OZ
…That’s a very good question!
VICKY
Why don’t you come down??
OZ
...I would very much like to get down!
Do you have a ladder? Or a very
tall man?
VICKY
I’ll have a look-see!
OZ
Wait, Vicky!
VICKY
What??
OZ
…It can be a very tall woman!
Preferably!
Vicky looks around for something to help Oz down from the
electrical pole.
POV
Vicky scanning her surroundings.
PAN RIGHT
The sight of a construction crane, a giraffe, a shovel and a
trampoline the shovel is resting on. The shot is about to
pass the trampoline but then pans back quickly and zooms in
on it.
CLOSEUP
Vicky is struck with inspiration.
VICKY
I have an idea.
ANGLE ON
Vicky digging a hole with the shovel, right next to the pole.
ANGLE ON
Vicky pushing the pole from the other side so it leans into
the hole. The pole tips, then leans, then plummets quickly,
leaving Oz dangling like a flag, holding on for dear life.
The pole eventually hits the diagonal hole. Oz is holding
onto the pole with his arms and legs, even though he is only
a few feet off of the ground.
VICKY
Alright, come on down!
Oz shakes his head.
OZ
Mmm-mm!
VICKY
It’s okay, you’re almost there!
OZ
No.
VICKY
(coaxing him)
Come on, it’s not that far, you can
do it!
Vicky pats her knee with her arm like she’s trying to coax a
cat down from a tree.
OZ
(scared)
I don’t wanna!
VICKY
(sighs)
Alright, hold on.
Vicky walks out of the frame. Then we hear her making sounds
of physical effort. She drags the trampoline into the frame
underneath Oz.
VICKY
Alright, just let go!
OZ
…You promise I won’t break all of
my things?
VICKY
Oz, COME ON!
OZ
Alright! Here I go!
Oz lets go, lands on the trampoline and is... bounced back onto
the pole. In the exact same position before he let go.
OZ
…Alright, I’m-a try that one more
time.
Oz lets go, lands on the trampoline and is bounced INTO the
pole, severely hurting him. His limp body lands back on the
the trampoline.
VICKY
See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?
OZ
(groans in pain)
The giraffe enters into the frame and starts licking and
eating Oz’s hair.
INTRO
The intro song for Season 1 is "Beat The Love" by Autoheart.
TITLE CARD
"Meet Halfway"
Click below to read more:
vvv
============
ACT 1
EXT. OPEN FARMLAND -MORNING
Vicky and Oz are taking stock of their situation.
VICKY
What happened last night? Where
even are we?
WIDE SHOT
A very zoomed-out shot of open farmland next to a paved
road, lined with electrical poles. A few sparse trees and a
thin stretch of wire fence are all that break the horizon.
CUT TO
Vicky and Oz.
VICKY
Do you remember anything from last
night?
OZ
No think, head hurt-ey.
VICKY
Those electrical wires lead to
civilization, but I don’t know
which direction.
Oz looks past Vicky, notices something and then points it
out to her.
ANGLE ON
Overhead shot of the tracks leading to the construction
crane from the road, in one direction.
ANGLE ON
Back to the protagonists.
VICKY
Alright. Before we head out, I
gotta recharge.
OZ
I don’t have any food on me.
Oz is surprised to see Vicky bounce on the trampoline to
reach the electrical wire attached to the pole.
OZ
VICKY WAIT-!!
Vicky grabs onto the wire, and many, many volts of
electricity immediately go through her. We see her skeleton
in brief flashes like in old cartoons.
OZ
AAAHHHH!!!!
Vicky lets go and lands back on the trampoline, and bounces
off and onto the ground.
VICKY
Alright! I’m energized and ready to
go!
She looks to Oz and is concerned at how terrified and
confused he is.
VICKY
Oh by the way I “eat” electricity.
Did I not mention that?
OZ
No! No you did not, before you
grabbed an active power line!
VICKY
Oh. Oz, hey, I’m sorry I scared ya-
She reaches out to touch him, and he recoils in fear.
OZ
THAT’S FINE! No worries! I’m
totally over it! ...Please no
touchies.
VICKY
Oh, alright. Well, I guess we
should head out. Time to re-trace
our steps. We’ll need
transportation.
Vicky and Oz look offscreen to their ideal method of getting
from Point Z back to Point A.
ANGLE ON
Vicky and Oz riding a giraffe. Or rather, clinging onto a
giraffe, which has a sloped neck and thus is not ideal for a
human to ride. They do this in silence.
BEAT
Until Oz makes a decision.
OZ
(like a twangy guitar)
~Doooo-do-DOO-do-doooo-do-DOO-do~
Vicky snickers.
VICKY
Hi-ho Silver, AWAAAAAY!
OZ
Do you remember anything about last
night?
VICKY
I remember how much my head hurts.
Why is it so hard to piece together
what happened?
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Flashback to the end of the school play. All of the
performers(except for Oz) are on stage, lined up facing the
audience. Including the elephants. They take a bow to mild
applause. Then Polly announces:
POLLY
Drugs for EVERYONE!!
The standing ovation and cheering makes the earth shake, as
Polly tosses narcotics into the audience.
CUT TO
EXT. OPEN FARMLAND -MORNING
VICKY
What’s the last thing you remember?
OZ
Uhhh…OH! I remember the explosive
finish of the finale.
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Flashback to Oz being shot out of a cannon.
ANGLE ON
Oz flying across the left side of the screen to the right, over a field.
CUT TO
EXT. OPEN FARMLAND -MORNING
The two hanging onto the giraffe.
VICKY
I guess that’s how you got on that
pole.
OZ
Pole? OH, yeah. Yeah, the
electrical pole. Hehe… Hmm.
Vicky isn’t sure what that means.
VICKY
Wait… Cannons? OH, right, that’s
after the big confrontation with
the knight and the dragon!
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Flashback to Polly, Vicky and Miranda in costume, after
their last scene together. They are backstage while others
are performing for the crowd. Miranda looks flustered,
surprised, processing something new.
VICKY
Hey, Miranda.
MIRANDA
(squeals)
POLLY
Whoa, girl! You feeling alright?
MIRANDA
I… Don’t know. I’m not sure how
to feel right now.
VICKY
…What do you feel about Brian?
MIRANDA
He… Well… He’s a commoner. He’s
misshapen. He’s poor. He does not
belong to a prestigious royal
family. He would be completely
beneath my station and prestige.
POLLY
Then why can’t you stop looking at
him?
Miranda’s face turns red and she tries to turn her heard
away from Vicky so she won’t see.
VICKY
Look: Brian’s not the best…stock.
He’s got a serious physical
handicap, so even just being alive
is more taxing on his body than it
is for most of us. But that just
means he’s ALWAYS giving us his
best.
MIRANDA
You speak well of him.
VICKY
If you don’t wanna go to prom with
him, that’s fair. You don’t owe him
that if you don’t want it. But I
think you dropped him for a pretty
shallow reason, for something that
wasn’t his fault. That’s not very
becoming of a princess.
MIRANDA
But…who will be my knight in
shiny armour??
POLLY
…Maybe he’s the one who could use
a bit of rescuing right now.
Miranda considers what Vicky and Polly tell her. Then she
looks to Brian, who awakens from his nap to take off the
dragon foam mascot head.
ANGLE ON
A fancy, elegant, soft pink bordered shot with lots of
sparkles as Brian takes off the dragon mascot head. In
slow-motion he shakes his head from side to side, his hair
swaying in a way that Miranda can’t look away from. A
flourish of a harp plays.
CUT TO
EXT. ROAD -MORNING
Back to the giraffe.
OZ
…So, are they dating or not?
VICKY
I don’t know. I don’t remember how
that resolved.
OZ
I wonder if the others ended up
somewhere as wacky.
CUT TO
INT. ??? -MORNING
Amira starts to regain consciousness in a bed. She battles a
hangover and is losing. She gets up and stumbles over to a
nearby closet, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. She opens
the closet and finds a dress she does not recognize. She
looks puzzled at it, but not entirely against it. Damien
walks into his bedroom, toothbrush in his mouth, his eyes
hit the ceiling.
INT. DAMIEN’S BEDROOM -MORNING
CUT TO
Amira at the closet. Damien quickly scrambles over, takes
the dress, shoves it back into the closet and shuts it
closed. Amira looks around and starts to regain awareness
that she is not in her home.
AMIRA
…This is your room.
DAMIEN
(toothpaste in mouth)
Yush.
He swallows it and wipes the rest off of his mouth onto his
arm, then tries to regain his tough-guy composure.
DAMIEN
What of it?
Amira is on the precipice of being pissed off.
AMIRA
…Who’s dress is that?
Damien, bug-eyed, sweating, tries to think of what to say
next.
DAMIEN
I… I got it from…
AMIRA
(through gritted teeth)
Where did you get it from, Damien.
I would like to know where you got
a dress from. I WOULD REALLY. LIKE.
TO KNOW.
DAMIEN
…I got it from… uh… OH! All
of the girls I cheated on you with!
Amira’s eye twitches.
DAMIEN
Yeah! Uh, I’M AN ADULTERER AND THAT
IS THE ONLY REASON YOU SHOULD THINK
OF A SEXY, FORM-FITTING DRESS BEING
IN MY CLOSET. No other reason.
AMIRA
Time to die.
DAMIEN
OH. I don’t think you’ll need to
bother.
AMIRA
What?
DAMIEN
I just remembered: you’re not
supposed to swallow toothpaste.
AMIRA
Lemme get you to the hospital.
CUT TO
EXT. HOSPITAL -MORNING
The closest hospital in Monstropolis. Damien’s body crashes
through a wall and lands inside, a streak of fire behind
him.
HOSPITAL STAFF(V.O.)
For the 8th time, Mr. LaVey, just
use the door!
DAMIEN(V.O.)
Hey Sheila.
CUT TO COMMERCIAL
ACT 1 END
==========
ACT 2
EXT. DAMIEN’S HOUSE -MORNING
Amira angy. She walks to school, hands in her pockets.
Along the way, someone begins crawling out of the earth.
A zombie emerges, covered in dirt! The large, imposing
creature that pulled itself out of the earth groans.
AMIRA
Hey Brian.
BRIAN
UUUUUGGGHHH.
AMIRA
Me too. You usually sleep six feet
under?
BRIAN
I was hoping you’d know why I was
down there. And also where most of
my clothes went. Last night is kind
of a blur. A painful, head-stabby
blur.
AMIRA
The only thing I remember from last
night is the submarine and… Oh no.
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Vera, Damien and Amira are on stage during the play. They
are looking(or trying NOT to look) at something offscreen.
Vera cannot look away, wide-eyed and blushing. She is
somehow disgusted AND entranced at the same time. Amira is
shielding her eyes with her hands and looking away. Damien
is nodding his head. Burlesque music is playing.
AMIRA
Is Oz STILL doing a strip-tease??
VERA
Yes he is.
AMIRA
Where did he even get a stripper
pole??
VERA
(in awe)
I don’t know but it’s…awful. And
mesmerizing. It’s like a poetic
car-accident.
BEAT
DAMIEN
…Nice.
CUT TO
EXT. TOWN SIDEWALK -MORNING
AMIRA
EUGH. Like I don’t already feel
like barfing as it is.
BRIAN
Did that happen around the time I
lost my pants?
AMIRA
I'unno. What am I, the Pants
Inspector?
BRIAN
Oh. I remembered why Oz was
doing that.
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Flashback to the play. Vera and Oz are about to do one of
their scenes. The curtain is closed.
VERA
Once the chainsaw-jugglers are
finished, that’s our cue. Don’t
fuck this up!
OZ
I won’t!
VERA
You better not!
Vera and Oz stand in silence. The sound of chainsaws and a
delighted audience fills the air. Oz is standing up
straight, face-forward. Vera is tapping her foot, her arms
crossed.
VERA
Because if you screw this up or
forget your lines or make me look
like a fool, I swear to someone’s
god-!
OZ
Right!
VERA
…Remember, sword in your right
hand, so your back’s not to the
audience.
OZ
You can count on me!
VERA
If you get stage-fright out there,
I’ll turn you to stone like that
forever so history will know how
bad you-
OZ
It’s gonna be okay. We’ve rehearsed
at least a dozen times, we know our
lines and our cues by instinct at
this point.
VERA
…Right.
OZ
It’s no big deal. We just have to
go out on stage where everyone can
see us and if we screw up even once
they’ll all see, with their eyes,
watching, judging. Criticizing our
every-
VERA
ALRIGHT, I get it!!
An exaggerated sound of a chainsaw, and a scream.
JUGGLER(V.O.)
AAAGH!! MY FACE AND MY BUTT!!! HOW
DID I MANAGE TO INJURE THOSE TWO
THINGS AT ONCE?!
VERA
That’s my cue.
Vera leaps across the stage in an arcing motion, flips and
lands on the other end of the curtains. As the audience
politely claps, she looks back to Oz, who gives her a
thumbs-up, and one of his phobias also gives a teensy-tiny
thumbs-up. The curtains start to pull open as the next scene
starts.
ANGLE ON
Wide-angle shot, as though shot from the audience, so Oz
looks smaller being so distant as he enters the scene
in-character.
OZ
(as Percival)
"What light through yonder window
shits?“
ANGLE
Closer shot of Oz.
OZ
(as Percival)
"It reveals to me… The ASSASSIN!
Stabitha Christie!!”
PAN LEFT
A fast pan over to Vera, the spotlight on her.
PAN RIGHT
Back to Oz.
OZ
(as Percival)
"You shan't cleave me in twain,
cleavage’d one! Have at you!“
Oz removes his fake rapier, and assumes a battle stance.
ANGLE ON
The wide-angle, far-back shot. Nothing happens. Vera stays
still.
OZ
(as Percival)
Uhh…. "Have AT you.”…Have… at
you?
ANGLE ON
Close-up of Vera wide-eyed. Frozen in place. Unable to stop
staring into the lights and the darkened shapes in the
audience. Someone in the audience coughs.
ANGLE ON
Polly, Brian and Vicky behind the curtains, watching.
VICKY
(whispering)
Oh no.
BRIAN
(whispering)
Does Vera… Does she got
stage-fright?
POLLY
(whispering)
Whoa, usually she makes other
people freeze up!
VICKY
(whispering)
This is really bad, we gotta do
something! Polly! Can you possess
Oz, make him do something to snap
her out of it?
POLLY
(whispering)
I can make him crap his pants!
VICKY
(whispering)
I… If it comes to that.
ANGLE ON
Wide-angle shot once again. A bluish-blurry shape hits Oz at
the speed of sound. Oz is briefly possessed by Polly, who
then immediately un-possesses him in a blue streak. She gets
on her hands and knees on stage next to him. She begins
vomiting ectoplasm. Oz looks at the vomiting ghost, then to
Vera.
CLOSEUP
Oz searches his heart for what he thinks his friends would
do. The world around him dims, and small, imaginary versions
of his friends appear around his head, to offer guidance.
BRIAN(IMAGINARY)
Don’t let her feel alone. Barf in
solidarity.
AMIRA(IMAGINARY)
No, barf MORE! BARFING CONTEST!
VICKY(IMAGINARY)
Distract the audience with a
seductive dance! (don’t barf
please)
The imagined friends vanish.Oz closes his eyes, and
steels himself for what he must do.
OZ
I knew this day would come.
Oz pulls out two objects. One is a CD in a case, which he
tosses to Vicky. Vicky catches it, sees the portable
stereo/cd player next to her, then looks at the CD case
which says: “For SEXY EMERGENCIES!”. Oz nods to her with
grave seriousness, then slams a pole he retrieved(from
somewhere?) into the stage floor.
Vicky puts the CD into the portable cd player/stereo and
hits the “Play” button.
CUT TO
EXT. TOWN SIDEWALK -MORNING
Amira and Brian trudging to school.
AMIRA
I don’t care why he was doing it! I
don’t wanna think about it, today’s
already off to a shit start!!
BRIAN
Oww, alright, just stop yelling!
Brian grabs his temples and rubs them.
BRIAN
Get up on the wrong side of the
bed?
AMIRA
Me and Damien had some… Trouble.
It’s no big deal.
BRIAN
Then you wouldn’t be mad.
AMIRA
Ugh… I found a dress in Damien’s
closet.
BRIAN
Ohhhh… Wow. He must be pretty
dumb to think cheating on you was
survivable.
Amira stops walking. Brian stops a second later, once
he realizes Amira is slightly behind him.
AMIRA
Brian, he didn’t cheat on me. It’s
HIS dress.
Brian is genuinely surprised to hear this, as the look on
his face shows. But this is text so you can’t see it, but
trust me, he is astonished.
CUT TO
EXT. TOWN STREETS -MORNING
Vicky and Oz still riding the giraffe. They are now firmly
within civilization.
VICKY
Well, I recognize this street, so
we’re getting closer. I really hope
I find my arm. It’ll be such a pain
if I have to get a replacement.
OZ
(playful)
I could give you a hand.
If Oz could make a cheeky smile, he would do so here.
VICKY
Oz, please, this is serious!
OZ
(cheekier)
I’m sorry. I guess you were really
attached to it.
VICKY
(through a snort of
laughter)
Alright, shut up!
OZ
Hey, Vicky, I’ve been meaning to
ask: What made you pursue Scott for
the prom?
VICKY
He’s a big, fuzzy, lovable boy.
He’s full of life and energy! It’d
never be a dull moment with him…
Why do you ask?
OZ
I dunno. Just thinkin’.
BEAT
VICKY
…Thinkin’ about what?
OZ
Well, you said how much you love
that show. The one with the girl
you like who wants to be with the
captain of the football team. I was
wondering if that had anything to
do with it.
VICKY
Do you really think I did all this
just to recreate my favourite TV
show? Because… Sorta.
OZ
…Do you think I’m weird for
wanting Vera to be my date?
VICKY
Well… I mean… I don’t know. I
can’t see you having a lot of fun
with her. Why?
OZ
I’m… Drawn to her. I get why
you’re drawn to Scott. Even without
the tv show, I get it. But I don’t
know what it is about Vera that
interests me.
VICKY
Are you having second thoughts?
Oz looks to the side of the road, and his tone becomes more
somber.
OZ
I still want to go through with it.
But I can’t put my finger on why
HER, specifically. I’m wondering
if… If my reasons aren’t very
good. And I wonder what that makes
me.
VICKY
How do you feel when you’re around
her? Nervous?
OZ
I’m always nervous. I’m… I’m
scared of so many things, Vicky.
But when she’s there, I’m…
Focused. I’m not obsessing about
all of the things that COULD go
wrong. I don’t hear all of the
negative thoughts anymore. Does
Scott make you feel that way?
Vicky looks solemn and contemplative. She must give an
answer, even an incomplete one.
VICKY
…I have to go with Scott. I gotta
be with the captain of the football
team! If I do that, then all of my
goals will be realized! Everything
I’ve worked so hard for. I have to
prove it to myself that I can, that
I’ll be…
Vicky remembers Miranda, and how she insisted on her fantasy
being made reality perfectly. She considers what this means
for her.
OZ
You don’t think about what happens
if things go wrong. You keep
looking forward. I admire that
about you, Vicky. I can only really
think of the worst-possible
outcome.
VICKY
Don’t say it-
OZ
What if Scott might not be
receptive to your advances? That he
might not appreciate you enough in
time. That this thing you’ve worked
so hard on, and done so much to
help us with might not work out for
you-
VICKY
Oz, stop! I don’t wanna think about
that! I don’t wanna be a loser and
a failure!
Vicky falls off the giraffe. She then quickly catches back
up to the giraffe and hurls herself back up onto its’ side.
VICKY
(moping)
You’re lucky. The girl you want is
gonna be your date.
OZ
What’s your Plan B?
VICKY
…There isn’t one.
OZ
…If you don’t have a date to
prom, I’ll go with ya.
VICKY
Oh, Oz, no. I’m sorry, but I don’t
think of you that way… I mean,
you’re cool! I’m not saying-
OZ
I don’t think “that way” about you
either.
VICKY
Oh. Good.
OZ
But we don’t have to be romantic
partners for that.
VICKY
…I don’t want pity.
OZ
It’s not pity. You worked harder
for this than any of us. I think
you deserve to go to this thing and
have a great time.
VICKY
I’m not gonna do anything to
sabotage your chances with Vera,
Oz… But... I appreciate it.
Vicky genuinely smiles at Oz. Oz's phobias smile back.
ACT 2 END
==========
ACT 3
EXT. TOWN SIDEWALK -MORNING
Brian and Amira are still talking.
BRIAN
Hold up: you found a dress in
Damien’s closet, and you think it’s
HIS?
AMIRA
It’s perfect for his body type. And
he watches enough Boo Paul’s Drag
Race to know what’d work for him.
BRIAN
You think he cross-dresses?
AMIRA
I don’t care! That’s not important!
He didn’t wanna be real with me, so
he gave me some crap excuse! Like
I’d dump his ass over that.
BRIAN
…Well…
AMIRA
Well WHAT??
BRIAN
I mean, you are pretty scary.
AMIRA
Thank you.
BRIAN
No, I mean… Uhh, never mind.
AMIRA
…What? You don’t think Damien’s
afraid of what I think, do you? He
eats the bullets cops shoot at him!
Foreplay for him involves medieval
torture devices! He’s not afraid of
me, the first thing he ever did was
throw a fork in my head!
BRIAN
And then you beat the shit out of
him and boinked. Then he showed you
his private collection of dead people.
Now he respects you.
AMIRA
Then why wouldn’t he respect me to
tell me the truth?!
Amira starts to walk ahead of Brian.
BRIAN
…Maybe he thought you wouldn’t
respect him.
Amira pauses, and turns around to resume the
conversation.
AMIRA
…Why wouldn’t I respect him?
BRIAN
Does anyone else know? Maybe he was
afraid of what you’d think.
AMIRA
…He put a lot of effort into
covering it up. But he’s not afraid
of anything!
BRIAN
And he brags about stuff he loves.
Violence… More violence? Does he
brag about drag?
AMIRA
He don’t brag about drag.
BRIAN
Does he rag on it?
AMIRA
No rag, no brag.
BRIAN
…That’s a drag.
Brian then catches up, and the two resume their
progress to school. Amira’s brow relaxes.
AMIRA
Shit, is this one of those
character growth things where I
realize I’ve been a butt?
BRIAN
Ehh?
Brian waves his hand horizontally, as if to say “maybe”. Or
“something to consider”.
AMIRA
Damn it! …I never thought Damien
would be the one to be sensitive
about something. I guess deep down
he’s actually a gentle soul.
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
DAMIEN
AAAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!1!!
Flashback to the play from the previous night. Damien is
covered in fake blood, bathed in orange lights to give the
sense of implied fire in the background, and he is laughing
maniacally. Also giving the implied appearance of fire are
the students hiding behind props slowly waving cardboard
cutouts with fire painted on them in the back.
DAMIEN
(as The Black Armoured
Knight)
"Come out, Princess Miri!! Your
diplomats were no match for my
armies and our break-dancing!“
Miranda is watching from behind the curtain, waiting for her
cue. Vicky is next to her. Miranda does not look at her.
VICKY
Alright, your line’s coming up. You
ready, Miranda?
Miranda is distracted, in thought.
VICKY
Miranda!
MIRANDA
…Why couldn’t he be the knight??
VICKY
Miranda, you’re on in a few
seconds-
MIRANDA
He knew how important this was to
me!
VICKY
You told him?
MIRANDA
Not with words, but I said it with
my eyes when he wasn’t in the same
room as me!
VICKY
…How was he supposed to know how
you felt if you didn’t let him
know? He can’t read minds!
MIRANDA
(pouting)
…Because I wanted him to.
Damien clears his throat loudly to get the attention of
Vicky and Miranda. Vicky looks to him and mimes a series of
hand gestures to show Damien he should stall for time.
ANGLE ON
Damien reacting to Vicky.
DAMIEN
Why are you doing that? Why do you
keep moving your hands like you’re
stretching something? Now you’re
raising four fingers! Why are you
pointing at your watch? What the
hell does "Stretching 4 Times”
mean?? OHHHHH SHIIIIIIT!!
Damien finally stalls for time instead of yelling out to the
girls behind the curtain.
DAMIEN
(as the Black Armoured
Knight)
"Uhhh… And now I will list the
many ways I will kill you!
Disemboweling! With a uh… Shit,
what are those things called? You
twist ‘em into stuff, they’re
always in the second drawer-“
ANGLE ON
Vicky goes back to talking to Miranda, losing her patience.
VICKY
Okay, Miranda, I’m sorry that
things didn’t work out perfectly
for you right away, but that’s not
Brian’s fault!
MIRANDA
Who?
VICKY
Oh my god. Look, maybe you’re used
to everything going your way in the
Merkingdom, but out here things get
difficult. Obstacles get in your
way when you’re not expecting them.
You can either give up, take it out
on people who don’t deserve it, or
you can keep fighting!
MIRANDA
…That’s… Chivalrous!
VICKY
Of course it is. Now get out there
and play the part you had the old
drama teacher threatened to get
until she ran off!
MIRANDA
With spaghetti!
VICKY
…Spaghetti?
CUT TO
INT. HOTEL BEDROOM -NIGHT
The drama teacher is laying on a bed with a plate of
spaghetti, her fingers gently caressing a noodle in her
fingers. Her mouth is smeared with pasta sauce.
DRAMA TEACHER
…Why can’t I quit you?
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
MIRANDA
(sighs)
I wish I had what they have.
VICKY
MIRANDA!!
MIRANDA
Alright, off I go!
Damien is interrupted by Miranda appearing.
DAMIEN
…and then several intact Furbies
combined to form a whip, and-
MIRANDA
(as Princess Miri,
unenthusiastic)
"Oh no, who will protect me from
this cursed fate. Who will be my
protector, my shining valiant.”
ANGLE ON
Vicky.
VICKY
Ugh. Alright, here we go!
ANGLE ON
Miranda notices out of the corner of her eye someone
approaching beside her. She recognizes something. The shape
of armour, but also an undeniably familiar puffy hairstyle,
poking out through a foam helmet. The figure draws out a
cheap toy sword and shield.
VICKY
(as the Brave Knight)
"No one touches my Miri!“
CLOSEUP
Miranda seeing something new and familiar for the first
time, as old and new sensations swirl around inside her. She
looks on in stunned awe as her fantasy takes on a form she
never could have imagined.
ANGLE ON
Damien’s back covering most of the right side of the frame,
with Vicky and Miranda further away on the left side of the
frame. Miranda is now committed to her role.
MIRANDA
(as Princess Miri)
"Brave Sir… Miss Knight! Defend
my honour!”
VICKY
(as the Brave Knight)
"You’re safe with me, fair
Princess!“
ANGLE ON
Damien. Just Damien in the shot, facing him.
DAMIEN
(as the Black Armoured
Knight)
"Hah! Fools! The prophecy states
that no sword can kill me!”
A toy shield flies in from off-screen and hits Damien in the
head.
DAMIEN
(as the Black Armoured
Knight)
"OWW!!“
ANGLE ON
Wide-angle shot of Damien kneeling, as Vicky and Miri come
closer to him.
VICKY
(as the Brave Knight)
"Any last words, knave?”
DAMIEN
(as the Black Armoured
Knight)
"Heh. You may have defeated me…
But can you defeat… THE DRAGON?!“
ANGLE ON
A wide shot looking out into the audience, as Vicky, Miranda
and Damien look toward something stomping toward them. The
world shakes as the great beast approaches!
ANGLE ON
Brian in his jammy-jammies and big, stupid dragon helmet. He
lightly waves his hands in front like t-rex arms and goes
"Mruuuhhhh.”
BRIAN
(as the Dragon)
"Mruuhhhh.“
CUT TO
EXT. SPOOKY HIGH ENTRANCE
AMIRA
That was a dumb-ass play!
BRIAN
Yeah.
AMIRA
Hey, thanks for… you know. Stuff.
BRIAN
Don’t mention it.
AMIRA
Miranda’s a dingus to drop a chill
dude like you.
BRIAN
I try my best. To not try too hard.
Amira and Brian arrive at Spooky High, just in time to see
Oz and Vicky arrive as well. They stop to take in the sight
of the giraffe. Oz waves from the giraffe before he and
Vicky leap down from it.
BRIAN
...How come they get a giraffe?
VICKY
Hey! You guys seen my arm anywhere?
Amira looks horrified, and then remembers Vicky is a
patch-work creature covered in stitches and made from
found-parts.
AMIRA
OH… Oh, that can happen?
OZ
She woke up without it in a field.
BRIAN
Oh that? I got it in my backpack
from last night, hold on.
Brian pulls out an appendage from his backpack.
VICKY
That is not my arm. I don’t even
know if that’s an arm.
BRIAN
Uh-oh.
Vicky’s missing arm comes in from offscreen, limply
flopping around.
POLLY
Hey Vicky! High-five!
VICKY
Polly! You found it!
Polly hands(lol) Vicky’s arm back to her.
VICKY
Darn thing has a habit of slipping
off. It’s so hard to stitch it up
one-handed.
BRIAN
You need it stitched up? I can
help. I got some magic string.
ANGLE ON
A school bus pulls up to the front of the school. Somehow
the protagonists arrived to school EARLY. Scott the werewolf
himbo and other students exit the bus. Scott notices Brian
on his knees with a thick strand of magic string in a needle,
stitching Vicky’s arm back onto her stump.
She is lying down on the ground.
VICKY
Ow. Ow. Hey Brian-Ow. How did-Ow.
You learn h-Ow. To sew. Ow. Ow. Ow.
BRIAN
I’ve had to stitch up my coat more
times than I can count.
AMIRA
Get a new one.
BRIAN
Hell no. It’s old, it’s worn, it’s
barely hanging together but it fits
me like a glove.
VICKY
That’s-Ow. Cool, Brian-Ow. Ow.
BRIAN
Aaaand, that should be it.
He pulls the thread in such a way that it all pulls tightly
together, joining the arm and the stump. The string glows
briefly, and then Vicky regains control of her arm. She
stands back up, pulls her sweater sleeve back down and tests
to see if her arm functions, which it does.
VICKY
Thanks, Brian! I really appreciate
it.
AMIRA
Green to the rescue.
BRIAN
Alright, who else is starving?
Polly emerges from the front entrance of Spooky High with
vending machine snacks and drinks
POLLY
Who wants to be unhealthy??
ANGLE ON
The protags eating and drinking unhealthy school snacks and
drinks, except for Polly who does not typically consume
food. Scott walks over at last, having psyched himself up in
the background.
SCOTT
Yo, guys!
VICKY
Oh, Scott! Good morning!
SCOTT
Hey, I’m glad I ran into you guys!
I’ve been meaning to ask something.
I’ve been thinkin’ about Prom
coming up…
VICKY
Yes?
SCOTT
And I think I’ve decided who I
wanna ask to be my date.
VICKY
YES????
SCOTT
But I’m kinda nervous. We haven’t
known each other for very long, but
I’ve got a good feeling about you.
POLLY
OMG, it’s HAPPENIIIING~!
(Yes, she says it out loud. "Awmgh")
SCOTT
I’m losing my nerve, so I’m just
gonna say it:
VICKY INTENSIFIES! The wait to hear him ask the
question she's always wanted to hear is unbearable!
The suspense is enough to nearly make her explode!
SCOTT
Will you go to prom with me, Brian?
ANGLE ON
Several off-key piano notes all at once. The protags
shocked. Vicky is in the back, drawn lacking any colour,
like an emotionally-shattered doodle on line paper, the
spirit having left her body. Brian is internally-panicking,
turning to face Vicky. Vicky regains some colour but is
starting to lower her head. Despair creeps up her legs and
nearly overwhelms her, as all of her plans fall to pieces.
BRIAN
Wh…Why me?
SCOTT
We got along really well yesterday!
You seemed like a cool guy who
likes sports!
BRIAN
…I did?
CUT TO
EXT. AUDITORIUM STAGE -NIGHT
Flashback to early in the play. While Polly is performing
the opening monologue possessing Liam’s body, Scott
is waiting backstage in his tree costume, when he
notices Brian slumped over.
SCOTT
Psst! Hey, bro! We gotta be ready
for our parts!
BRIAN
I know, I’m just… Exhausted.
SCOTT
You look tired. Were you so excited
to be in the play that you couldn’t
sleep so you spent all night
playing football against yourself?
BRIAN
Nope.
SCOTT
You should. It’s fun!
BRIAN
Ehhh, my athletic days are over.
SCOTT
You sports?
BRIAN
I did once Sport. I was on Track.
SCOTT
On track to what?
BRIAN
…I ran a lot. But my body can’t
do it anymore.
SCOTT
Your body can’t RUN anymore??
That’s the scariest thing besides
fireworks and mailmen and going to
the vet!
BRIAN
Well, that’s life for me. I’m just
trying to conserve energy before my
part. It sucks being so low-energy
all the time.
Scott feels sorry for Brian’s predicament. He considers
this tired dude's lot in life, and decides he will try to help!
SCOTT
Don’t worry, bro! I got ya!
BRIAN
Hey, wait, wait-!
Scott hurls Brian over to where his mark will be later in
the play. He lands with a thud. This catches the attention
of Polly who is possessing Liam, but then she goes back to
ruining the opening monologue in Liam’s body.
POLLY
(possessing Liam)
"So anyway, DUH, I’m Liam! I’m
pretentious and I only like bands
you don’t know!”
She then makes him blow into both of his hands to make a
very loud fart sound. Then she un-possesses him, leaving him
balancing on his better leg.
POLLY
Nailed it!
CUT TO
EXT. SPOOKY HIGH ENTRANCE
Back to the present in front of the school.
OZ
How come you couldn’t possess me
for long?
POLLY
(horrified)
Because there’s DARK SHIT in you,
and I never wanna go back! DON’T
MAKE ME GO BACK!!!
ANGLE ON
Brian and Scott.
BRIAN
Oh, uhh… Hey, Scott I… Uhh.
VICKY(V.O.)
(defeated)
Brian, it’s okay.
Brian turns to face Vicky, who is now in the shot.
BRIAN
Vicky…
VICKY
Scott? Brian’s a really cool dude.
You’d be lucky to have him as a
date to prom.
Vicky smiles weakly. Brian sees this and cannot bring
himself to accept Scott’s offer. He is about to answer
Scott’s question, when suddenly the sound of orchestral
fanfare fills the air.
ANGLE ON
A chariot pulling up to the school, and a long red carpet
being unfurled out of it, leading to the protagonists. A
figure in ceremonial armour stomps toward them with purpose.
They trip for a moment and regain their composure. They
reach the end of the carpet, and then take a knee.
KNIGHT
(dark, muffled voice)
What is your name, Blue One?
VICKY
Uhh… Vicky Schmidt.
KNIGHT
(dark, muffled voice)
Vicky…
The knight lifts up the visor part of their helmet,
revealing… Miranda Vanderbilt.
MIRANDA
…Will you do me the honour of
accompanying me to the prom??
Vicky is short-circuiting. The others wait on bated-breath.
Vicky looks over to Brian, and then gains some stability
back. She turns back to face Miranda.
VICKY
I…uh... You wanna go to prom with me?
MIRANDA
Indeed! You’ve shown me that a
knight need not be a large,
handsome man! Your nobility shines
through your devotion to your
friends. We can both feel like
royalty AND knights in shiny
armour!
Vicky looks down at Miranda, considering what she says.
VICKY
…Apologize to Brian. For throwing
him out for such a petty reason.
MIRANDA
…Wait, THAT’S Brian? I thought
his name was “Blimp”.
The protags stare at her.
MIRANDA
…As you wish. Sir Brian, I offer
my sincerest and humblest
apologies.
BRIAN
You’d better treat her to the night
of her life. She’s earned it.
MIRANDA
She has.
Vicky looks down at Miranda, sadly, contemplating. Life
threw her two curveballs. She looks at Miranda’s great eyes,
overflowing with hope for reciprocation. Vicky closes her
eyes, takes a long breath and looks back to Brian. She
smiles at him, and he nods and smiles back. They turn to
face their suitors.
ANGLE ON
The screen being split down the middle. On one side is
a close-up of Vicky. The other side is a close-up of Brian.
Brian's side pans up to his face, while Vicky's pans down to
her face. Very dramatic speed-lines are featured, to
highlight the intensity of their response:
BRIAN & VICKY
YES!
ACT 3 END
CREDITS
The song "Fifteen Minutes" by Mike Krol plays over the credits.
("Monster Prom" belongs to Beautiful Glitch)
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