==========
FADE IN
INT. PERFECTLY NORMAL SCHOOL -MORNING
A blonde white woman walks in through the front doors of a
typical American high school. She is conventionally
attractive for her age in a bland modern Hollywood way.
Upbeat pop music plays.
KATE
Look out, Typical High, because
Kate has arrived!
MONTAGE
A- Kate putting on her makeup in her bathroom.
KATE (V.O.)
I’m an ordinary girl, in the
Ordinary-Girls-between-13-25
demographic!
B- Kate is out walking her dog, but the dog has walked
around her until her very long leash has wrapped around her,
and she shrugs and laughs off such a quirky sitcom event to
have happened to her.
KATE (V.O.)
…But I’m anything BUT ordinary!
C- Kate is raising her hand in class to answer a question
diligently.
D- Kate is in cheerleading practice, but stumbles slightly
at one point which serves to make her relatable to somebody.
KATE (V.O.)
I’m ready to take high school by
storm, in a way the focus groups
said wouldn’t surprise or
intimidate white girls!
E- Kate is talking and laughing with her friends: a girl
with glasses and the only minority figure who is also
slightly chubby.
KATE (V.O.)
With a little help from my friends,
I’ll get the captain of the
football team or whatever!
F- Kate is engaging in a cult ritual at night, blood
dripping down her face as she chants unholy things the
audience can’t hear, but can somehow feel.
G- Kate and her friends are striking poses in a hallway to
signify that the introduction is about to end, and the title
card will soon appear.
KATE (V.O.)
So get ready, Typical High! Kate’s
here!
CUT TO
Closeup on Kate’s face as she winks and smiles a slightly
unsettling amount of teeth. The camera lingers on her long
after the voice over narration finishes. She doubts whether
to continue smiling as the camera remains filming,
uncomfortably long after a scene like this should have
ended. Even the standard pop music ceases long before the
title card appears.
CUT TO
TITLE CARD
NARRATION(V.O.)
"Put A Clever Title Here Later!“
Fridays at 5 on OTV!
CUT TO
EXT. SPOOKY HIGH COURTYARD -NOON
Four teenagers(?) watching a video on a phone. They are
all sitting next to each other on a concrete "rise", legs dangling
over. They are next to some stairs leading to part of the main
building of their school. Behind them and below them is grass
and a single tree. They are the only students nearby.
- "OZ", a skinny, meek young man with dark grey "skin", and
no visible mouth. Bright, simple eyes, like chalk on a
blackboard. Short hair that blends in with the colour of his
skin. White dress-shirt under a yellow-orange vest, with
the sleeves rolled up to the elbows.
- "VICKY", a very short girl with large aspirations, poofy black
hair, and a body constructed from different parts. Stitches
are visible across sections of her pale green skin, under her
blue sweater. Like Oz, her sweater is also rolled up to the
elbows.
- "BRIAN", a tall, Korean-American zombie who is usually
too exhausted to show extreme emotions. He wears a big,
many-pocketed green jacket. Teeth are visible on one side
of his face where a hole has formed(from prior
decomposition).
- and "AMIRA", a young black woman who is also a Fire Djinni (Genie).
Red crop-top jacket with a high collar, thigh-length
black dress, long boots and a mohawk made out of fire. An
even more intense personality.
VICKY is holding up her phone featuring the previous
segment. She is showing it to BRIAN, AMIRA and OZ. All four
of them are noticeably Non-Human compared to the human
actors in the trailer they finished watching.
BRIAN
(impressed)
Holy shit, that sucks!
VICKY
Yeah, it’s awful! But I love it!
OZ
Why do you love it if it sucks?
AMIRA
You can like bad things.
OZ
…But… Should we?
VICKY
Well, one good thing about it: it
introduced me to all of you! We
only met because you checked out
what I was watching on my phone
while we were all here at the same
time for unrelated reasons.
OZ
That IS a summary of why we’re here
talking.
BRIAN
Oh God, I don’t wanna be indebted
to this show.
AMIRA
Dude, don’t fight it. Can’t decide
what gives your life purpose, makes
you feel alive. You can either try
and snuff out that fire or bask in
the warmth of it!
VICKY
…Wow, that was actually kind of
profound!
AMIRA
You know it. I’m deep.
OZ
Why do you like it, Vicky?
VICKY
It’s cute! I like the main
character, she’s confident, she’s
pretty, she has lots of nice
friends. And I gotta know if she
goes to prom with the captain of
the football team!
ZOOM IN
Vicky becomes drenched in shadow.
VICKY
(growling)
I MUST KNOW.
WIDE SHOT
The lights are back on in the scene and her friends take a
moment to process what she just said.
OZ
Speaking of… what are your guys’
plans for prom?
BRIAN
Staying home and reading comics.
VICKY
WHAAAAAAAT??
AMIRA
Yeah man, Brian knows what’s good!
Who cares about prom?
VICKY
But it’s a once-in-a-lifetime
event! Bonds formed! Memories made!
An excuse to dance and dress pretty
and celebrate our youth while we
can!
AMIRA
You can do that any time. I do.
OZ
I wouldn’t mind going but I don’t
have a date… But it’s okay, I
have my nerd hobbies to keep me
company…
AMIRA
More like NERD hobbies. Hah!
OZ
That’s literally what I said.
There’s no clever play on words
there!
BRIAN
Amira, weren’t you just saying prom
doesn’t matter?
AMIRA
It matters now that I know Oz wants
it.
OZ
I mean, I can see the appeal!
Imagine how good it would feel if
the person you wanted to connect
with on a special occasion thought
you were… worthy enough.
VICKY
See! Oz gets it! And it’s not like
there’s a prom when you’re 30 or 40
at some office building. This is
the only prom we’ll get!
AMIRA
Vicky, there’s a prom every 3 weeks
at this school.
VICKY
And that makes it 3 times more
special!
OZ starts counting on his fingers to try and understand the
math VICKY is using. She steps down off of the concrete
ledge they were all sitting on and onto the grass below
them.
VICKY
Come on, guys! I bet if we focus,
and put our heads together, we can
all get dates to the prom! And if
we’re having trouble, we can help
each other out! Don’t you want this
to be an amazing, unforgettable
night of our lives??
The three students sitting on the concrete rise look to each
other, but only OZ responds without incredulity.
OZ
…Do you really think it’s
possible?
VICKY
You bet! If we work together,
there’ll be no stopping us! We’re
all gonna get to go to Prom with
the monsters of our dreams!
OZ gently, awkwardly stumbles down off of the ledge and onto the grass in
front of him, closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and joins
VICKY, nodding. Then he turns to AMIRA and OZ. VICKY pats OZ
on the arm before he addresses the others.
OZ
I’m in!
AMIRA smiles, shakes her head and rolls her eyes, but BRIAN
raises a single eyebrow. Then he sighs, and hops down. He lands face-first
into the dirt with a heavy THUD. He gets to his feet and joins OZ and VICKY.
BRIAN
Ah, what the hell.
VICKY high-fives BRIAN.
AMIRA
You guys are clueless.
BRIAN
Afraid you won’t get a date before
us?
AMIRA
BITCH, you think I can’t? People
are gonna be BEGGING me to be their
date for prom!
AMIRA hops down and singes some of the grass underneath her
feet as she joins up with the other three. Because she is a
fire Djinn.
OZ
So… What’s the plan?
VICKY
Simple! First, we add each other on
our phones. Then, we find the
person we each want to take to
prom. We do whatever we can to win
their affection.
BRIAN
What if it’s too hard?
OZ
What if they don’t like us?
AMIRA
What if they find out I’m hanging
out with you dweebuses?
VICKY
Then we’ll help each other out! We
can get to know your suitors too,
put in a good word for each other.
OZ
Isn’t this manipulative?
VICKY
No, it’s Romance!
AMIRA
I don’t need help attracting
anyone. People are like moths to a
flame for me.
BRIAN
Because you have a fire theme.
OZ
If we’re such lame-o’s, how come
you were hanging out alone at lunch
too?
AMIRA
I… Man shut up, I ain’t alone!
I’m… Independent.
BRIAN
What if the person you’re aiming
for thinks that’s weird? It
couldn’t hurt to have backup.
AMIRA
Hmm… I WOULD look hotter next to
you guys. And it’s got nothing to
do with me not having a lot of
friends because I have "attitude
problems”!
VICKY
Alright! It’s settled! These next 3
weeks are gonna be the craziest,
most awesome of our young lives!
BRIAN
Afterlife.
VICKY
Come on! Hands in the centre!
VICKY, OZ and BRIAN put their hands on top of each other’s.
AMIRA looks at BRIAN giving a slight wry smile. She gives a
wide, condescending smile back, and places her hand on top
of his and it immediately starts burning his flesh. His
smile evaporates.
VICKY
Alright real quick, “Monster Prom”,
on the count of three!
EVERYONE
3, 2, 7, 5, 8, R-!!
VICKY
Oh my god are you serious??
BRIAN
PLEASE HURRY THIS UP!!
VICKY
Alright, when I say “Now”… NOW!
The camera cuts to a view looking down at their hands, and
then quickly zooms out as they raise their hands, and
triumphantly shout:
EVERYONE
MONSTER PROM!!
TITLE CARD, FOR REAL THIS TIME
“Monster Prom”
CUT TO
The same shot of the four of them with their fists raised in
the air after shouting the name of the show. Except now
AMIRA is texting on her phone, while VICKY, BRIAN and OZ are
still posing.
(BEAT)
OZ
…So what episode of the Kate show
has the blood cult stuff? Does that
actually happen, or…?
CUT TO BLACK
("Monster Prom" belongs to Beautiful Glitch)
