Mass Effect 3: "Whores"

I think everyone can agree that the ending to Mass Effect 3 is just about the worst conceivable ending for anything. I don't think I'm being controversial in saying that. I think that's something we as a species has decided unanimously. Even the people who reviewed it on professional gaming rags seem to think so, but that didn't stop them from giving it Infinity out of Ten.

There's always been a long-standing suspicion that Publishers of games can buy good review scores. We've never had anything to prove it, and we might not have it now. But when I look at the disparity between the things the critics have to say, and things the fans have to say, it's getting harder and harder to hide.

Something is definitely wrong with games criticism, and for once it's not Yahtzee.

Via "Mass Effect 3 in a nutshell".

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7 Better Endings For "Mass Effect 3"

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-Powerless, the survivors have no choice but to defeat the Reapers... THROUGH THE POWER OF DANCE!

*Cut To: All of the Reapers exploding
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"Katawa Shoujo" Review

by Alex Hill

4.5/5

Katawa Shoujo is remarkable. A love-letter not just to the disabled or to animu dating sims, but to the paralyzing panic of love. We know in our heads things we can't always come to terms with on the inside. We can know, but we can still be hurt or fearful. We can find ourselves hurting the ones we love without trying to, and not understand why. The goal here involves your character becoming romantically involved with one of several girls with disabilities. I don't believe Four Leaf Studios did this out of some fetish or pity, but because they believed in this project.  

It's an honest glimpse into the human heart.

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Penny Arcade, Mass Effect: "Pandora's Box"

Some people started a donation drive thingy to "Take Back Mass Effect 3" after the childishly stupid ending was discovered, mostly by people who had paid hundreds of dollars for the special edition of the game that promised the ending wouldn't be childishly stupid.

They figured the best way to send a message to Bioware that they ought to do something about this would be to show it with their money. But in a misguided attempt at kindness, they decided all funds would go to Child's Play.

Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins, two people who -liked- the Mass Effect 3 ending, have decided to reject all funds directed to Child's Play from this movement. Their reasons?

"Child’s Play cannot be a tool to draw attention to a cause.  Child’s Play must be the Cause."

And you know what? As much as I hate the idea of needy kids being deprived of joy that such money could buy... I agree.

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OCRemix: "Maverick Rising"

Good enough.

Although now I have no reason to ever go to OCRemix.org again. They've pretty much done everything I've wanted to hear from them.

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~A.H.

Brawl In The Family

I made 200 comics without punchlines, and I'm fit as a fiddle. Matthew Taranto has made nearly 400 comics that are unrelentingly cute and warm and fuzzy, and he gets a debilitating illness out of it.

That is BULLSHIT.

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~A.H.

Obsidian: "Metacritic"

Business sucks, alright? It's cold and rigid and occasionally unfair. Such is the case with Obsidian's Fallout: New Vegas contract with Bethesda, wherein the developer only received royalties if the game matched or exceeded an 85 rating on Metacritic.

Who would do that? What kind of numbskull bases huge business decisions on the score they get at a review aggregate site? That's like a movie studio determining salaries based on the score they get at RottenTomatoes.com.

I don't think even the guys at EA or Activision are that reckless.

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~A.H.

Bioshock: "Founding Father"

When I say: "George Washington robot with a machine gun", Did you giggle? Did you think: "Fuck yeah! All it needs is a velociraptor!"? Now what if I told you it was an enemy in the new Bioshock game?

Now what if I told you it looks completely immobile, so that only a complete idiot standing in its line of fire could possibly get hurt?

Now what if I told you that Ken Levine was being compeltely srs-face about this, and is actually marketing this as a "heavy-hitter", "terrifying" opponent? The one who looks like a Simpsons joke and can be defeated/ignored by taking two steps away from its line of sight.

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Mass Effect 3: "Homosexuality"

The tragedy is that this person is stuck writing for Gamespot. That's not fair.

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~A.H.